The Saga: Moving Part III

Ok, so we had our THIRD buyer fall through! Just last weekend. Do you how hard it is to sell a house THREE times? Well, now we have to sell it a fourth =)

Actually, this last situation made me upset because we had a low-income family trying to obtain the house.  A single mother with her mother and daughter wanted to move in.  They loved the house, it was a good layout for them, and they were using a state aid program that was reputable.  In fact, they only needed to put down $500 for a deposit and Massachusetts was willing to come up with all the rest of the asking price we wanted.  Amazing.  And then, when we finally felt great about helping someone in need and accepting the welfare program they had, the buyer’s father drove by the house and talked them out of it.  He said that the neighborhood was not good enough for them, for the money they were going to put in.

Ok first of all, the state was putting up the money, not them.  Second of all, the neighborhood is fine.  It is cool, quiet, safe, flat, and family friendly.  Third of all, the father isn’t the one living in the house.  He didn’t get to see the inside (which is what the buyers liked the best) and isn’t even married to the mother anymore.  Fourth of all, this is a low-income family in an upper middle class suburb who shouldn’t really have that excuse.  I was so upset.

I am definitely getting tired. But I suppose it is just part of the process. I mean, we really want to move and confirmed that point. And if prices continue to fall in Boston (and they probably will because housing is inflated about 76% in the last five years alone according to statistics), then it could take a number of years to come back up to our break even point. We could be stuck.

Why move from Boston you say? Isn’t Beantown the coolest? Well it is. Except that things are so expensive. The average house in my neighborhood sold for $389,000 just two years ago. And our car insurance is like $1000 per car too. Plus, it’s like a Big Brother state the way the laws are set up and the government watches your every step. I’m not kidding! We have two police officers in our neighborhood who watch for people fudging on their building permits, an appraiser from the town who stopped by last week to walk through our house and make SURE we hadn’t added any square footage without notifying the office, preschool teachers who visit your home routinely to make sure you’re not too weird, cops who will snag you if your inspection sticker is ONLY FIFTEEN DAYS overdue, real estate laws that prevent you from evicting your own tenant if you are a renter, immunization laws which require your child to have a physical every year to the day and all the newest vaccines (including chicken pox) to attend school, courthouses who will fine you if you flash your lights at someone who’s going too slow on the highway, insurance companies who won’t insure you if your fence has not been professionally surveyed to make sure you’re not over the town boundary line at the front of your yard, libraries who do not give even one day grace period on your returns, restaurants who won’t let you use their bathroom unless you buy something, contractors who must report uncoded repairs you haven’t made, and worst of all… police departments who refuse to help you if your car battery dies on a hot summer day—even if you are pregnant with three toddlers in the car! (They’ll tell you to take the problem to the fire department).

So all these reasons and more chalk up to good excuses to leave. Please hope with us that we’ll get out before the kids graduate

Saga: the Riddles’ Move, Part II

So in Part One I told you about WHY we want to move to Cincinnati. Now I’ll catch you up on the process so far.

TO RENT OR TO SELL?

So for awhile we talked about whether we should rent or sell. The housing market is the worst it’s been in many years, so we weren’t keen on selling at first. In fact, Boston’s housing prices have risen 76% in the last five years whereas the standard of living has only increased 16%. So there is a big bubble here that is waiting to burst. I mean, who can justify buying a house that is more than three times its actual cost?

But then we looked into renting and that turned out to be a distasteful option. For one, we would have to upgrade our heater and fix all the possible problems if we were going to have an tenant. Lots of money up front. Then we’d have to have a property manager, which raises the rent level needed. Then we’d have to get the rent we needed, which was pushing what was expected at this time. But most importantly, if we rented we’d have to find a tenant with children older than 6yrs because there is a law that unless your house has been professionally deleaded (thousands of dollars), you cannot legally rent to families with young children (or those who might have children in the future). Not only would that knock out the exact demographic who’d like our house, but how would you find a renter like that? You can’t advertise for no families with young children, or couples who won’t have them, because that is discrimination which is also illegal. And you can’t take your chances because people can sue you until their child is 23yrs old if they ever acquire a lead problem. Or you’d try to evict someone and that would be discrimination, which is illegal.

SO you are basically in a bind as a renter in this state. We’d probably have to invest enough money into upgrades and management that we would come out close to even years later when we sold it at a better price. Take into account that you have to provide lawn and snow service, that you might have to deal with repairs long distance, that renters can trash the place or not pay properly and you are liable, and that you might have trouble getting a renter after each year and have to cover two mortgage payments, and you basically are thinking, Thanks But No Thanks!

SELLING

So we decided to sell. Fortunately, we got the best broker in the world and he knows our house well because he was the Seller’s Agent when we bought it. He knows every upgrade we’ve done, how much it was/is worth, etc. Plus, he’s the top realtor in our town for several years running. He spoke to us at length about our options and a pricing plan, and then we launched in, the last week or so of March. It was a total whirlwind to get things ready because we hadn’t planned on listing it that early, so I literally spent about four days straight cleaning, washing, repairing, painting, decluttering, hanging, etc. I was up one morning until 2am scrubbing the kitchen!  Then I was outside another weekend, in the rain and snow, hanging shutters and planting tulips!

You know how you always get your house better for selling than it EVER was when you owned it!

So we put it on the market and someone wanted to see it the very next day… our first showing! We actually had about four showings in three days plus an Open House. And we got our first interested buyer who was adamant that their offer was the only one we’d get. It was low, so we waited and when another interested buyer came along, our first buyer offered $10,000 more and we went under agreement. But, it was not to be. They had been difficult negotiators to begin with, and they proved difficult. Three weeks, about twenty showings and one more Open House, and one inspection later, our buyers caved. They just wanted a perfect house and less money. After the inspection (which went pretty well), they came back with a laundry list of every upgrade they wanted and we couldn’t accept that for the price they were offering. So we let them go.

Then our second buyer—previously the competition—stepped in. They offered the price we wanted and we were thrilled. But then, two days later, their lender called and told them they couldn’t get the financing they wanted after all. So our second offer under agreement failed.

Now we are back to the drawing board. It is difficult to want to keep the house on the market longer since it is hard to keep it so clean and evacuate every time there is a showing. It is hard to believe we’ll get another offer since most people in our area aren’t even getting ONE they like, and we already got two. Plus, we are past the magic first month mark when the property is exciting on the market. Are we doomed to just sit? Our showings have slowed. It is hard to say…

We’ll keep you updated!

Saga: the Riddles’ move, Part I

Ok, so we have been trying to move to Cincinnati for the last month.  It has been quite a saga!  Let me fill you in.

WHY CINCINNATI?

Since most people have no idea why anyone would want to move FROM Boston TO Cincinnati (neither people here nor people there understand it), let’s just say that we have been wanting to move from Boston for some time now.  We really aren’t Bostonians.  We hate the weather, people are standoffish, and it is one of the most expensive places to raise a family.  Very quaint, and it has grown on us in many ways, but that’s no good reason to stay.

So, we looked at moving to Dallas about two years ago.  That was Plan A.  We did some work long-distance, for a pastor friend of ours whom we hoped to help when we relocated, but then he closed down his church in favor of parachurch (outside the local church) ministry.  So that plan fell through.  Fortunately, we were just having fun and not far into the planning stage, so no loss there.

Then, the option to move to Cincinnati came up.  This was Plan B.  Will had a Gordon-Conwell professor who was located there (teaching in Boston occasionally) and invited him to come visit.  Will and his friend Brad went about 18months ago and loved it.  The pastors they met out there were so welcoming.  It was just the kind of city they were looking to help… not too large, not too unwieldy, not too far away, not too unreached, not too churched, into mercy ministries, open to newcomers and new forms of help.  We had also considered other mid-size Eastern cities like Pittsburgh, Rochester, Indianapolis, etc.  But Cincinnati was the first city we actually got to visit, and we really liked it.  The Midwestern feel was also a nice adventure since we had already experienced South, New England, Florida, and Chesapeake.  (And we weren’t ready for the West

So we considered moving there for awhile until a very close friend of ours here wanted to come on board and encouraged us to stay in Boston and plant a church here instead.  This became Plan C.  We started drawing up plans to do that for about four months and got pretty far, but vision and ideals weren’t totally in line so that came to naught.  Disappointing but at least we didn’t get too far that it would have been upsetting.

So then we returned to Plan B.  Will and Brad took a second trip out there with some friends and even though it was almost a year later, they still loved it.  We have been exploring the possibility of starting a halfway house, a Christian drug addiction recovery program, in order to get a start in the city.  We have had lots of encouragement from our contacts there, so we’ll see.

First, we have to get there which is proving more difficult than we thought…

Nat’s 4th Birthday!

For some reason, Nat’s birthday is the easiest to forget. I think partly because it’s in April and people are usually in full swing at their jobs and stuff. Samuel’s birthday is right after Christmas, and people are cognizant of that when they are buying gifts. Will’s too, except just before. And David’s and mine are close together in August. But Nat’s is all alone in April.

This year, the Riddles were in the middle of trying to sell their house (another post), so there was even more temptation to forego big parties. Will was actually out of town, in Cincinnati. But wouldn’t you know it, when the big day came, there was little Nat asking me, “When are the people coming over?” So I had to think quick!

Perceptive as usual, Nat was the first to ask me this question. The boys talk about their birthdays almost every day, so it wasn’t unusual for him to know that today, the day of three house showings, was still actually his birthday. What was unusual was that he expected the whole deal: cake, balloons, presents, and of course, a party with people. So with a little imagination, and a little flexibility around the house showings, we were able to plan a little celebration…

First, the “red balloon” he had been asking for, for days…

Then, the first house showing where we went out to lunch…

Mmmm… Papa Gino’s. Nat was a little upset about his runny cheese, but everyone seemed to enjoy the treat.

Then, the second house showing where we went to get the big surprise… some fish!

Everyone loved doing this. They didn’t even demand “Nemo” fish, which we couldn’t have gotten because clownfish are saltwater and that would have required a real aquarium with special equipment. I told the pet store guy that we needed fresh water fish that were easily portable (in case we moved), easily cared for (no aerators or anything), and wouldn’t die within a couple days (nix on the goldfish). So he said we needed Betta’s. For those of you unacquainted with Betta’s, you’ll learn that they eat each other! So you have to get divided tanks. Thus, our four little guys, each with their own space… our KIDS don’t even get their own rooms, so they are one spoiled bunch! =)

Each person got a fish so no-one was left out, and each of the boys named their fish. Mommy named Abigail’s. Can you guess who named which?

Ok, so the answers are: Samuel: Hamster; Nat: Shark; David: Fire; Abigail (Mommy): Hannah. Did you guess right? And each boy named their fish for very characteristic reasons. Samuel named his Hamster because he saw hamsters for the first time in the store and thought that was a cool word; Nat named his Shark because in actuality he really wanted a shark and was depressed when I told him not this year; David named his Fire because his fish was red; and Mommy named Abigail’s fish Hannah because we needed a girl fish. (Don’t think the Betta will be too depressed even though it’s technically a male!)

So that was the outing to the fish store.

For the third house showing, we went to the park. Sorry, no photos.
THEN, finally Nat’s “people” came over. We had Craig, who gave him a Thomas balloon. Gus and Velleda, who gave him a cool stamp set. And Nancy and Rendall and Taylor, who gave everyone a new book (Nat’s was a birthday book, obviously). The kids were thrilled. They partied like it was 1999.

And of course, the best part… cupcakes! Make a wish, Nat!

David’s Big Year (2yrs)

Here’s David!

He’s grown so much this year, really become quite a little person. He is currently two and a half… going on six! He is such a pal with his older brothers that we constantly have to remind ourselves that he is not even a preschooler. I suppose that is common with subsequent siblings. You let them see movies they’re not ready for, give them jobs they’re not coordinated enough to do, put them in bunkbeds, allow them to do things alone, let hem “help” in all kinds of adult ways, and generally find them talking and acting like they’re years older than they are… in this case, even when they’re only two!

Such is the case with Mr. D.

But then you can’t blame him… he has a lot to keep up with! With two older brothers, there are always so many things going on that he has to get in the mix or risk being left out. And he was one of those fortunate babies to never have trouble putting things in his mouth or misusing small pieces. So he learned very early to get in the game—he was talking and playing with everyone well at only 18 months old! Since then he has blossomed into an amazing two year old. Funny, reliable, smart… he’s a true friend.

Witness the growth…

Here he is at 15 months, making a nice tower for us. (Sticking legos together is universally one of our kids’ most important milestones.)

Nice tux! (16 months, at Chris and Michelle’s wedding, Christmas 2006).

Domestic duties =) 17 months.

Lego constructing getting a little more complex…

Bonding with Abigail. An underestimated skill. (18 months.)

Banging, stacking… no problem! (19months.)

Sporting a smile, (21 months.)

Doing the slide all by himself! (22 months.)

Can we go home yet? (23 months)

Happy Birthday, David! (24 months.)

“D-A-V-I…”

Hold on a sec, Mom. Conference call. (25 months.)

No sissy stuff for me, guys. Yardwork is a man’s job! (26 months.)

All right! I’m finally a construction worker! (Christmas 2007, 28 months).

Ooooh! Upgraded to the Big Boy carseat. (29 months).

If you buck me, horse, you’ll regret it! (30 months)

Abigail’s last couple months

Well, as everyone knows, the twelve month age is a big benchmark. They rapidly leave “baby” stage and move right into “toddler” stage. While it is sad to watch the baby months melt away, never to be retrieved, it is fulfilling to watch the little personality emerge more expressively. Although it will be some months more until Abigail can talk with us, she is able to let us know what she wants, how she feels, and that she loves us. (almost 14 months old).

Here’s a profile:

What she can say:

• Hi/bye-bye
• Mom/Dad
• Yes/no
• Bob the builder (come on, priorities!)
• cheese
• ball
• uh-oh
• woof woof
• sock
• baby
• whoa, whoops, wow, and other w- exclamations

What she understands: Everything. She’s a girl! Talking comes soon after breathing.
What she does:

• strews a laundry pile around in little deposits around the house
• gets bubbles all over whenever she visits someone in the bath
• chews Samuel’s lego wheels (and pretends very well that she isn’t)
• points, babbles, runs, hums, repeats rhythms, stands on tiptoes
• carries her cup around just in case
• 
• loves to roughhouse and make Tarzan yells on the bed
• plays hide and seek, peekaboo games
• pretends with toy phones, cars, vacuums, food
• likes to “help” Mommy prepare food, fill the dishwasher, sponge, sweep
• “helps” her brothers do whatever they are doing
• 
• watches Mommy very carefully when she applies makeup (Not til you’re thirteen, honey!!)
• sits on her brothers, crashes on them, rolls on the floor with them, hugs them, and generally sees them as perpetually huge stuffed teddy bears

Her favorite things:

• Samuel’s stuffed Nemo
• 
• Her bear
• 
• Lego wheels (told you about that already)
• shoes (no surprise)
• the phone (ditto)
• 
• her brothers
• Bob the Builder figures, videos

Socially:

• loves her Daddy a lot now
• has started to let other people hold her on their laps
• yells “cheese” for photos
• 

2008 Begins!

Ok, I know it’s already March but I’m just getting around to writing “2008″ on my checks. Here is the Riddle family as we currently stand…

(p.s. You can double click on any picture below to see a large blow-up in your browser.)

Will

Will is entering his sixth month working at home, and it has been a great transition. Still working for IBM as a project manager, he is on the phone at least half the workday on conference calls with India, France, and other exotic locations. He’s glued to his laptop at all hours, but we now have the fabulous flexibility to eat together, play with the kids, and sleep on hours that fit our natural routine. There are now the six of us in our little house all together, and he has done a remarkable job adjusting to the conditions that that raises… even if it means more cleaning up and “shhhh-ing” on my part

Jaime

Jaime is having a lot of fun with her four youngsters. Everyone is so cute and expressive that it less of a job and more of a laugh riot, dealing with everyone and their problems! She is missing not having a baby this year but is a much happier camper now that Will has started taking her on “dates” a couple times a month =) She is currently considering getting a telecommuting job and giving some more time to her church where she is involved with crisis pregnancy counseling. This year has brought the biggest rewards now that “life” includes her husband on a daily basis =)

Samuel

Samuel is a full-fledged five year old! This is exciting because life has kind of begun for him, at five. He has transitioned from preschool to pre-kindergarten this year, and is learning to read and write amazingly quickly. Plus, he is now old enough to really communicate with us, express his thoughts and desires, and ponder what he wants to be when he grows up… which, in the past six days has included successively: a fireman, a daddy, a guy who builds “thingies”, a policeman, and an old man with a cat. We will keep you posted on what he finally chooses

Nathanael

Nathanael is in the throes of the silly years of three and four. Bright and happy, his favorite things are nursery rhymes, silly voices, and little pretend games. He doesn’t care much for structured activities, but he is very verbal and imaginative. He picks up a lot by listening and will often comment to me later about what he overheard, and ask for clarification… the funniest little things come out in the car or at bedtime! He is currently undergoing some sensory and motor therapy, but he has done a fabulous job of adjusting to being both an older brother and a younger one. He is very good at caring for Abigail, and I can see them continuing to have a nice relationship when they’re older.

David

David is all, and more, of his two and a half years. Talking to him, you’d think he was at least double his age. His favorite word this month is “Actually” so conversations with him currently go something like this…

Hey David.

Hey Mom. What should I do?

What do you want to do?

Well, actually I need some food.

Ok, but it’s not dinnertime yet. Thirty more minutes.

Ok. But actually I want to watch.

Oh, you do? Ok, what should we watch?

Actually, Bob the Builder is my favorite.

Ok, let’s watch Bob.

YAAAAAYY!

If anyone had told me that my two year old could be thinking like he does, I would have never believed it. I often forget that he is not four and five like his brothers. David is currently the Reminder around the house, telling me when I forgot Daddy’s straw, why Abigail is crying because she doesn’t want to play with Samuel, and when I need to stop at the red light. Unfortunately, he’s always right!!

Abigail

Abigail is a spunky, sweet, wonderful little girl. She has brought so much into our lives since she came, and it is so fun to dress someone in pink and flowers. She has a lot of personality at only one year old and is remarkably understanding for her age. I guess this is what happens when a little sister come last! Although you can tell she has brothers because while she doesn’t speak many real words yet, her favorite is “Bobbbb da bah bah” which anyone in-the-know knows is the famous first strain of the Bob the Builder theme song.

Samuel (5yrs)

Life for Samuel has been very busy this year! He’s been in pre-Kindergarten now, three days a week, where they work very hard with the kids… reading, ‘riting, and ‘rithematic. He is doing very well, continuing in the long line of smarty-pants in his family =) While his language has not been without some setbacks, after several years of working hard, he is a typically bouncy and excited five year old. He’s able to tell us all kind of cool stuff.  Yea!!

Here’s a typical Tuesday in the life of Samuel:

• 7:00-7:30am- wake up, get dressed, eat breakfast
• 7:45- leave for school
• 8:00- 2:45- school
  • opening activity, songs
  • English
  • snack (he eats almost his whole lunch at this time, his teacher told me =)
  • recess 1
  • math
  • storytime
  • lunch
  • recess 2
  • arts and crafts
  • nap
  • closing activity, songs
• 3:00- snack and homework
• 3:15-5:00- playing with siblings
• 5:00-5:30- dinnertime
• 5:30-6:00- free time
• 6:00-6:30- clean up, get ready for school tomorrow
• 6:30-7- bath, pajamas
• 7:00-7:45- family time
• 7:45- bedtime

Pretty busy for a five year old, right?

Samuel is excited about life. Agreeable, interested, funny… he is a great kid. Here are some random facts about him, just to help you get to know him better (straight from his own mouth)…

Samuel Stats:

1. Favorite food: cookies
2. Favorite toy: Legos/K’nex
3. Favorite color: yellow
4. Favorite activity: anything outside
5. Favorite teacher: Mrs. Nelson
6. Favorite friend: Matty
7. Favorite job: laundry
8. Favorite person: Abigail
9. Least favorite food: dried apricots
10. Least favorite toy: puzzles that are too big
11. Least favorite color: white
12. Least favorite activity: cleaning up when there are too many pieces everywhere
13. Least favorite teacher: I don’t know
14. Least favorite friend: I don’t know
15. Least favorite job: going to the bathroom
16. Least favorite person: Barney

There you have it!!